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Question: I am engaged! What should I know about marriage?

My fiance is 22, and I am 25. We both accumulated some debts from our college years at Columbia. We are also looking on buying a Steinway grand piano as we are both heavily involved in music. My fiance is planning on going to Officer Training School and join the military as an officer.

Keeping this in mind, I would appreciate advice on money management as a couple, typical life of a military wife, life living on base, importance of regular sexual activity (seriously), buying our first home, involvement of in-laws in our marriage, when to have kids, and anything else that you think is important that I did not mention here.

The only conflict I have with my fiance is that his in-laws, who are native Koreans, want to move in with us because they want to educate and raise the children that we have in the Korean Christian culture. I don’t really mind them helping out, but I would like some privacy in our lives.

Answer: First of all, congratulations on your engagement.

I’ll address your questions in the order that you posed them. Let’s start with your financial/debt problems. My advice would be to set aside your monthly payment for loan repayment plus $100, just in case you run into problems next month. Your husband is joining the military, and there’s a good chance that they may assist him with repaying the loans.

As for your piano, you need to remember that Steinways, while arguably the best, are the most expensive. I would look into a used baby grand, and I would not spend any more than $20,000. Try to get a plan that will let you pay for your piano over a period of 5-10 years. Be picky!

As for living on base, it’s great since you can connect with other women whose husbands are in the military. The only bad thing is that they have all these ridiculous lawn mowing, gardening, and maintenance requirements. But other than that, I think living on base is awesome: you get tax free shopping and there’s always some community event.

Sex is important in any relationship. For new couples, I think having sex at least once a day is vital to making a marriage survive romantically. As for kids, use condoms until you’re ready to have them (I would wait at least a few years).

Make sure that you watch your money! Money can make or break a marriage.

Good luck!

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Question: What happens if you send a scavenger debt collector money?

I know it’s a huge mistake, but my boyfriend… in a not-so-smart move, sent a scavenger debt person $200 because he got scared when he read the word “sue” in the stupid letter. Instead of consulting anyone about it, he sent the money and they cashed the check. He’s talking to a lawyer next week, but what happens if you send them money? Does it reactivate anything? Do these firms have the ability to report to credit bureaus? This was regarding a debt he owed back in 1997 in California. We live in Iowa now.

Remember this is not a collections agency. It is a law firm that buys debt from CAs.
My main concern is can companies like this (who are NOT collections agencies or creditors) report to credit bureaus? He has worked so hard to repair his credit.

Answer: The Statutes for Iowa are as follows:
Open account: 5 years from last charge, payment, or admission of debt in writing.

So in effect, he has restarted the time clock on this debt. He could have just thrown it away as they had no legal recourse and could not have sued him.
Was this payment a settlement payment or just a single payment to hold them off. No matter what, they can now take civil action in court to collect the full amount including legal fees.

HOWEVER, this will not reset the SOL for reporting on his credit report as per:
Running of Reporting Period – Section 605 [15 U.S.C. § 1681c]
As of December 29, 1997 the reporting period runs 7 ½ years (7 years plus 180 days) from the date (month and year) of the last delinquency (known as “last missed payment:).
So, regardless of how long a creditor waits to charge off, sell or transfer a debt, they must report the true and correct “delinquent or last missed payment” date (month and year) that preceded the creditor’s action.

Use the following link to see if the so called Law Firm is truly legit, many debt collectors use bogus letterheads or pay a lawyer for the use of his letterhead. If it is a bogus letter, then you have rights under the FDCPA regarding misleading collection attempts.

http://www.budhibbs.com/drowning_in_debt.htm

At least he got smart enough to consult a lawyer on this one.

Hope this answers your question.

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Resume Details – 07.13.2010 We’ve passed the mid-year mark and the good news is that there are tangible signs of recovery. Even the economic storm clouds over Europe appear to be subsiding.

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